If you were a rose in a garden, would you be complaining about not being an oak?
We often miss the opportunities life throws at us because we don’t feel we’re quite ready for them yet: we’re still not as slim, as rich, as (throw in your favorite inadequacy) as we think we should be to make use of these opportunities and enjoy life. We constantly compare our own situation and personality with those of others, and it’s rarely in our favor. So we think we can’t be happy until we get the attributes of someone we consider to be happy, no matter how trivial they might be – body shape, amount of money, personality traits…
But the only way to really be happy is to accept who we are and to celebrate our uniqueness instead of trying to become as uniformly “happy”, “good looking”, “powerful” as others. We are not other people, and there’s no use in trying to be someone we’re not.
Do you remember the fairy tale about the Ugly Duckling? It remained ugly to the animals on the farm as it wasn’t what they expected it to be, but it was beautiful to other swans. Morale of that story could be that if people around you don’t appreciate you for who you are, then go and find another circle of people, those who will accept you and who will help you to accept yourself instead of making fun of you or trying to change you.
But if the fairy tale wasn’t enough, here are 4 practical reasons why it’s smarter to accept and cherish your wonderful self instead of trying to become something you’re not:
1. Being aware of your uniqueness energizes you. Trying to be someone else drains your energy
There’s real power in tapping into your inner peace and strength, but you just can’t reach them if you’re unwilling to accept that you’re completely fine just as you are. You get so busy discovering all the ways you need to change who you are that you barely have time for anything else and you’re always questioning yourself, always worrying if you did everything right; you can’t rely on your internal compass to show you the way because it’s not your way you’re on.
On the other hand, nothing can match that feeling when your energy and strength come from knowing who you are and what you have to offer. When you’re in touch with yourself things get so much easier because you can simply listen to yourself to know whether you’re on the right path or not.
2. It’s relaxing to accept yourself in your uniqueness
Related to the above point, when you’re following someone else’s path you’re constantly struggling, you’re constantly under stress. When you know who you are you can just go with the flow. So relaxing!
3. When you accept yourself, others will accept you
As long as you don’t know who you are, others can’t know it either so they can’t really accept you. They can do so only when you’re true and authentic – only then can they know who they’re dealing with and choose to really accept you. Or not, but that’s OK too.
4. It’s simply a better use of your time
When you let go of trying to be someone else, you get so much time and energy to spend doing something really fun and useful, and all that being you!
Will everyone like you once you accept your uniqueness? No, that’s for sure, but that’s how it’s supposed to be. As Bruce Lee said,
The only person whose approval and acceptance you really need is you. So what are you waiting for? What kind of life do you think you can manifest if you don’t even know who the person behind your thoughts is?